“Learning to follow your intuition is a lesson in letting go and relinquishing control.” – You Can’t Make This Stuff Up
How can we create the life we want to live?
First impressions are everything -they can make or break us. We are taught early on not to judge a book by its cover, but for most of us it becomes a habit. Whether we’re meeting someone new or assessing a situation, we tend to use our gut feeling for guidance. We end up relying on this immediate impression to tell us how we should act or what to say.
Yet this can lead us astray. Because what really is an impression? Essentially it’s an unconscious opinion created with little to no information. And unless these opinions are proven incorrect, we’ll continue to assume that our beliefs are the truth. So why do we give these unconscious impressions so much value?
How we see the world can only be described through our own set of eyes. It depends on a plethora of personal details which shapes the way we expect to see the world. But it’s not just about what we see -our first impressions. It’s also understanding that our impressions influence our actions.
At a young age we begin to create a concept of our world by labeling, sorting, and then categorizing everything we interact with. So if we meet someone new and they’re smiling at us, we assume that they are friendly and safe to be with. Whereas if we came across a growling dog that’s lunging at us, we know to keep our distance. Our brains are designed to use our past experiences to inform our present ones. It makes sense! If our assumptions have gotten us this far, why should we question them?
But the issue with trusting and then relying on our assumptions is that we’re now creating expectations about the future which are based on the past. Thus we stay stuck in a cycle of assumed outcomes where nothing new can occur.
If we want to take back control of our lives we have to get out of our own way -cancel the cruise control. When we go into situations with preconceived notions, we aren’t allowing for anything new or different.
Think about what happens when we enter the dating world. Some of us are focused on our appearance and sending out the right vibe, while others are more closed off and hesitant due to previously failed relationships. Our experiences from the past are affecting how we present ourselves now, thus what the likely future outcome will be. How can we expect to attract someone “Right” when we’re too focused on avoiding someone “Wrong”? So by releasing control and letting whatever will be to be, we’re stepping into the unknown and creating new possibilities.
This same mentality applies to how we approach our lives each day. There’s a big difference between getting and going through the day. If we’re constantly just getting through the day we are sending out signals that we’re unavailable, unapproachable, and stuck in our ways. We’re just trying to survive. But when we’re going through the day we are open, engaged, and searching for opportunities.
So what would happen if we decided to date our future, to actively woo our dreams into coming true? This would require a mindset of thriving, not just surviving. The energy we radiate into the world each day gets reflected back to us. It becomes the lens of our expectations. Thus when we allow our intuition to overtake our initial impressions, a larger scope of experiences arise. From these various new experiences we can choose to engage with the ones that best pair with our desired future. If we can truly enter every situation with an open mind and heart, then we can align with and enhance the emotional state that will attract our dreams to us.
Practices & Motivations
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